The person you marryshouldnt expect you to spend every waking moment with them, because you have hopes and dreams beyond the scope of your relationship. 1) They are grown and fully matured: Gaslighting and ghosting do not exist in these relationships. Compassion toward your partner allows him or her to feel respected, appreciated and cared for and it fuels the connection, intimacy and partnership. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. Some of those qualities are evident in a new relationship but are often much less important in the long run. Respect. The person you marryshould make a point of expressing why they appreciate you, how they feel about you, and what physical qualities about yourself that they find attractive, handsome, sexy, or hot. A partner who supports your personal and career goals understands that not everything in your marriage will be about them, or even about you as a couple. You both will have individual goals, and they will be by your side cheering on your efforts. Randi Gunther, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and marriage counselor in Southern California. Adding these little qualities of a successful marriage to your marriage will take you a long way, a long and happy way. They're Your Best Friend You shouldn't just love the person you're with you should truly like them, too. Marriage is being described as suffocating for some individuals. And commitment involves avoiding infidelity in all its forms. Conflict is inevitable in human relationships. These characteristics of a good partner will help you find the right person, which in turn will ensure a happy, healthy relationship. There will always be differences between people, sometimes leading to disagreements. They won't be clingy or demanding of your time. I noticed you unloaded the dishwasher and I really appreciate it.'". Having a good wife For some people, a successful marriage means having a good wife. There is a problem with hoping another person will change: People tend not to, at least not for long. For most people, physical affection is a must in a healthy relationship. They Stay Committed. Forgiving someone who hurt you deeply is one of the strongest, most difficult things you will ever do. By identifying the top 10 strengths of happy marriages, the researchers were able to identify happy and unhappy marriages with 93% accuracy.2. This article Qualities of a good partner in a marriage does not encourage us to look for a partner who has to be the same type as us. Studies show that greater sexual communication resulted in increased orgasm frequency in women as well as greater satisfaction for both men and women. Healthy ways to handle lifes stressors. The hard part is when hurtful things are said, but your partner refuses to apologize. You should also feel that they are a good resource for times when you might be under stress. Multitasking with ADHD: How to Reclaim Focus? 9. As women have increasingly achieved similar. When it comes to looking for someone who is marriage material, think about the things that are most important to you, including your values and goals, and pay attention to whether your potential partners possess those qualities. 9: Desire for Home and Children A woman's desire for home and children has become less attractive to men over time. Couples build trust in a relationship when they: Mutual trust and honesty are essential and important qualities in a relationship. If a wife is taking care of the kids, so should the husband. Pay attention to how they treat the people in their lives, from their peers to their parents to the people they encounter in everyday life. But the fairness that drives those agreements sometimes must be upended by an unexpected crisis that requires giving beyond the fairness that is normally present. Posted May 4, 2022 I cant speak for everyone, but there are three things that turn me on more than looks ever could: confidence, sharp wit, and an ability to make me think. Conflicts, when handled in a healthy way, can benefit a relationship and help couples come to a resolution. These are the 11 qualities that fall into that category. It makes all the I love yous meaningless. The nurturing that is necessary for any intimate relationship to thrive is the easy comfort of a pseudo-parent-child interaction without judgment. Benefitting from a physically affectionate partner doesnt only mean you have a great sexual connection. Procrastination And Laziness: Their Differences & Connections, Bedtime Procrastination: Why You Do It And How To Break It, 15 Books on Procrastination To Help You Start Taking Action, How to Achieve Your Goal Effectively (Step-by-Step Guide), How to Overcome Complacency in the Workplace, How to Commit to Your Passion Projects When Youre Busy, How to Cope With Anxiety-Induced Procrastination, How to Break the Perfectionism-Procrastination Loop, Work Life Balance for Women: What It Means & How to Find It, 6 Essential Mindsets For Continuous Career Growth, How to Discover Your Next Career Move Amid the Great Resignation, The Key to Creating a Vibrant (And Magical Life) by Lee Cockerell, 9 Tips on How To Disconnect From Work And Stay Present. Spending quality time and making each other feel special by dedicating a set amount of time just talking is one of the best things a person can do for their partner. Being able to crawl into the haven of loving arms not only can heal the moment but also heal the trauma that may have driven it. Obsessive thoughts often entail taboo topics that people dont normally worry abouti.e., violence, sexual criminality, blasphemy, etc. This quality also plays a key role in communication, which is essential in any good relationship. It ensures that your partnership is well-rounded and has the fun and flare of a friendship, plus the romance and sexual chemistry of a relationship. They build on each other's strengths and address differences creatively to work together for the best interest of the marriage. Shaking off your own sadness. An ideal partner has grown up. Time. When partners share goals for the relationship, they tend to forge a stronger bond. Sometimes life presents us with open doors of opportunity that could lead to a new career, a new house, a new hometown, or (insert the limitless possibilities that could occur here). How could it be possible to keep on loving a person you don't respect? What Does Authenticity Look Like in Romantic Relationships? It's a mysterious package, delivered by subtle sensory clues. A great partner is someone who thinks not only of you but of others as well. The people in these partnerships make mutual decisions based on reality rather than assumptions made in confusion and conflict. and is passionate about writing on them. But the characteristics of a successful marriage include the ability to handle these conflicts healthily. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, OCD can make your marriage feel like it's going nowhere, Source: Tembinkosi Sikupela @lexhosaguy/Unsplash. Front Psychol. Marriage is difficult on its own; one does not need to nitpick at what their partner wears, does, goes, and behaves. I feel the need to clarify that Im not saying any look is inherently better than any other. Sels L, Ceulemans E, Bulteel K, Kuppens P. Emotional interdependence and well-being in close relationships. Respect is the bedrock of any relationship, especially a marriage. Restraint. 8. If the marriage lacks respect, the couple can underappreciated and undervalued by their partner. I can still hear my wifes anguished voice during one of our first therapy sessions together after we heard of my diagnosis with OCD. A 2014 study from the National Bureau of Economic. published a study in which multitaskers were put to MRI scans. One of the biggest qualities to look for in a partner is someone who wont be afraid to put their device down and give you the undivided attention you deserve. To help you get started, consider these 25 qualities of the person you should marry. Different people are attracted to different things, so feel free to post a comment and tell us what youthink aretwo or three qualities of the person you should marry. Though it is often comforting and more secure to know what your partner might or might not do, it is never as compelling as new thoughts and personal transformations. One of the most important characteristics of marriages that last is the ability to forgive. Most people share their happiness but keep their struggles to themselves. reveals that the simple act of holding hands, cuddling on the couch, or even getting a massage from your spouse will boost relationship satisfaction. https://firstthings.org/building-a-strong-marriage/, The Stigma of Seeking Help: How the Military Mirrors Society, Obsessive Thoughts and the Imp of the Perverse, How Storytelling Can Enhance Therapy for OCD, Unearned Privilege: 1,000+ Laws Benefit Only Married People, Why Many Single Women Without Children Are So Happy, 13 Signs Your Marriage May Be Over and 7 Things to Do Next. Career Self-Care with Inc.'s Minda Zetlin. Couple Flexibility. David Culkin, Ph.D., is an Army veteran and adult educator who has learned to survive OCD and even thrive with his wife for over 26 years. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. Compliments are always appreciated. Living and sharing your life with someone you love requires consistent effort and commitment. Part of good communication is being a good listener and taking the time to understand what it is your spouse wants and needs from you. Choosing the right personand being a good partner yourselfis critical for a lasting relationship and long-term satisfaction. 29 Qualities of a good marriage partner. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. Having good communication with your spouse is one of the most important things in a marriage. What Makes a Good Partner? If your partner is bogged down in debt, or misses payment after payment, or is unemployed and doesnt seem to care, then his or her financial woes will become a constant source of stress as soon as you tie the knot. There is a good balance of leisure time spent together and separately. Its the little things that make your romance flourish. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0163543. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Sexual boundaries: Your partner respects what you want and do not want to do between the sheets. Not only is that a good habit but also one of the most appreciated qualities of a healthy marriage. They are supportive and treat you well. had less empathy and emotional control than those who focus on one thing at a time. Empowering Women: Key Rights of a Woman in a Live-in Relationship, 200+ Playful Truth or Dare Questions for Couples, Treading Carefully: Getting Back Together After Separation, 15 Signs You Have an Unexplainable Connection With Someone, 6 Ways to Tell if Someone is Lying About Cheating, How to Handle Psychological Effects of False Accusations in a Relationship, Twin Flame Telepathy: The Symptoms, Techniques and More, 15 Ways on How to Build Trust in a Relationship, 15 Best Ways to Emotionally Detach From a Narcissist. Living with another human being long-term is difficult. The 4 Unmistakable Characteristics of a Successful Couple for You. The effects of lack of joint goal planning on divorce over 10 years. However, some couples might undervalue the importance of the relationships physical aspects, which can become harmful in the long run. There will always be challenges in every relationship, both from within and from without, and some couples have more than their share of losses. Our marriage space is sacred and private. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. There are common signs that indicate a relationship is at risk for a final break-up. There is difficulty completing daily tasks in the marriage. People who are able to take care of themselves are also in a better position to give care, attention, and support when you need it. One of the most unfortunate things is that this is one of the most common marriage problems. Read less. The person you marryshould intrigue you in the same way a really good movie does; no matter how many times you watch it, you still enjoy the experience, and always seem to notice something new with each additional viewing. 5 Signs Your Partner Is Marriage Material. Read our, 8 Ways to Provide Emotional Support for Your Partner, What to Do When Your Partner Works Too Much, Benching in Dating: What to Do When You've Been Sidelined. The person you marryhas every right to expect the occasional date night, road-trip, vacation, or adventure of their choosing; however, they shouldnt feel like you always have to be doing something in order to enjoy your time together. Humility, resilience, and humor are among the behaviors most likely to sustain a relationship. When people are asked to list the most important qualities in a potential partner, kindness, physical attractiveness, an exciting personality, and income/earning potential tend to top the list. Productive Procrastination: Is It Good or Bad? Rather than butting heads over issues and leaving problems to fester, healthy communication promotes resolutions that help both partners feel happier. It's a mysterious package, delivered by subtle sensory clues. Want to have a happier, healthier marriage? One of us wishes the other was more willing to share feelings. Honesty is extremely important - Your life partner is the person who will see you through your highs and lows. Does Merging Finances Lead to Marital Bliss or Disaster? The gifts you give reveal how you view the relationship. Accountability can only serve its purpose if behavior change follows the recognition of contribution. Beyond that, they are going to be more pleasant to be around in the long term. It's normal for couples to feel some level of disconnect from time to time. Partners in happy marriages reported having personalities that complement one another. They have found ways to integrate the totality of their life experiences in a composite of quiet confidence. when it comes to having an amazing sex life. You should be able to smile at each other for no good reason (other than the fact that youre so happy to be together), and you should have inside jokes that no one else in your social circle gets.. The Journal of Health and Social Behavior found that physical intimacy is good for couples. Couples in the survey shared that they were happier and more satisfied when household chores were divided between the two partners. The same applies to you too, fellas. The person you marrydoesnt have to agree with you on every issue, but even so, you must have a mutual respect for each others core beliefs and values. While life is meant to be fun, that doesnt mean it should resemble a 24/7 shopping spree. Interestingly enough, when reflecting on the first years of our marriage, we see that most of our ownproblems fit in the Top 10 Problems in Marriages. It wasnt until we identified the problems related to OCD and addressed them head-on that we began to move more toward claiming the Top Ten Strengths of a Happy Marriage. You will find many challenges in a marriage, but the challenges of OCD add another complete layer of difficulty. and we . Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. It takes time to grow and understand each other. The person you marry should carry themselves like a responsible adult, not a reckless teenager. A person who would make a good life partner should be strong, responsible, and capable of being alone. A calm attitude allows people to approach conflicts in a way that leads to productive solutions that make relationships stronger and more successful. Another benefit? She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together. Closeness. Try to spend a few minutes each day discussing deeper or more personal subjects to stay connected to your partner over the long term. Keep reading to find out the 10 best qualities of a good, Here are listed the 10 traits in a partner that you must look out for. 1. Benefits of being in a committed relationship include: If you know your partner can commit, you wont be afraid to engage in more significant ways, such as getting married, moving in together, or starting a family. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with a person who cant appreciate the simple act of looking into your eyes, basking in your presence, and enjoying the silence? When you are with someone you know you cant trust, jealousy, suspicion, and heartbreak will become a regular part of your world. 1. The Importance of Time Management: 6 Ways It Matters, Poor Sleep Quality Comes from All the Things You Do Since Morning, 12 Time Wasters That Suck Your Productivity While You Work, How to Live a Full Life (Without Compromising on What Truly Matters), Achieving Goals: The Ultimate Guide to Goal Achieving & Goal Setting in 2022, What Is Motivation And How To Get Motivated (Your Ultimate Guide), How to Increase Mental Focus and Stay Sharp, How To Get Fit If You Have a Busy Schedule, What Is Motivation And How To Get Motivated, What Is Procrastination And How To Stop It, Achieving Goals: The Ultimate Guide to Goal Achieving in 2023. There are certain characteristics of a successful marriage that these couples must try to adopt. Emotion regulation predicts marital satisfaction: More than a wives' tale. Without trust, a marriage would be full of doubts, insecurities, jealousy and uncertainties. Do the Relationship Secrets That You Keep Ever Get to You? Commitment takes a lot of the drama out of a relationship. And if you have found one, never let them go! Well, I'm here to tell you that there is hope. 1. This isyourlife, so do your thing without apology. Being kind and understanding of your partner is a great habit because it honestly does not hurt anyone too much. Do you want to know the best traits to look for in a husband? Long-term relationships too often fall prey to the same-old predictable interactions. Be honest about what you're feeling, but be kind and respectful when you communicate. We strive to keep our commitments but, of course, reasonably expect reciprocity when we need it in return. Emotion. If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married. Not only in the way you talk to him but the way you treat him, privately and publicly. Communicate clearly and often. The answer usually lies somewhere in the middle. As divorce rates surge, its important to know that although some marriages arent meant to last, you should at least try. 1. The person you marry doesnt have to be on the exact same life path as you, but your trails should converge in enough places so that you can both reach your final destination together. 4. These characteristics of a good partner will help you find the right person, which in turn will ensure a. with the spouse is one of the key characteristics of a good partner. Is your impression correct? If they cant love youall of you! 6. 2016;78(3):680-694. doi:10.1111/jomf.12301, Iveniuk J, Waite LJ, McClintock MK, Teidt AD. In order to do this, you need to search past chemistry and the physical attributes you find very attractive. Facts and Figures, Daily Tips for a Healthy Mind to Your Inbox, Emotional interdependence and well-being in close relationships, Emotion regulation predicts marital satisfaction: More than a wives' tale. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle Read more in their lives too. When you are emotionally intimate with your spouse, you are able to: You build emotional intimacy with your partner when you spend quality time together. A mature, loving partner is someone who can forgive your mistakes, whether they be big or small. 2 See https://firstthings.org/building-a-strong-marriage/ for more details on strengths and problems in marriages. Telling your OCD story can be therapeutic. The essential trait of successful marriages is being. Not only is that a good habit but also one of the most appreciated qualities of a healthy marriage. Loneliness can cloud our judgment, leading us to seek companionship when its not optimal for our well-being. The survey of marital strengths found that most happy couples feel their conflicts are resolved, and disagreements are less about placing blame and more about finding common ground. It makes all the I love yous meaningless. The person you marry doesnt have to enjoy spending time with your family (just ask any married person you know how they feel about their in-laws to discover how unrealistic that idea is), but they should still have enough respect to do so without complaint during the holidays and special occasions that are important to you. One of the best tips for a healthy marriage is to let your partner be who they are. Trust is the foundation that allows you to depend on someone and their words. Sex differences in marriage and single life: Still debating after 50 years. For a marriage to be healthy and long-lasting, it needs commitment and love. Feeling unsafe is one of the biggest signs of cPTSD. Compatible Personalities. It's important to talk about more than just parenting and maintaining the household. The person you marry needs to be faithful to you and only you (unless you both have agreed otherwise). Does couples' communication predict marital satisfaction, or does marital satisfaction predict communication? There is strong evidence that couples are happier when they are best friends. They show up over time and are driven by the core beliefs and personal philosophies of those who are determined to live a meaningful life in whatever endeavors they participate in. Be vulnerable without fear of being judged, For most people, physical affection is a must in a healthy relationship. 3 Reasons Why You Feel Overpowered by Your Partner, Words in Love Wont Get You Where You Want to Go, How to Navigate Difficult Family Relationships, How Complex PTSD Can Affect Intimate Relationships, Why a Mother Would Cut a Child Out of Her Life, Why the Pain of Separation Could Be the Truest Measure of a Relationship. and why you shouldn't blame yourself for feeling that way. What Is Emotional Abandonment in Marriage. Independent An independent person will not rely on you to take care of them or keep them happy and occupied. I would never tell you to not marry a person just because they suffer from alcoholism or suicidal thoughts; being unwilling to confront those obstacles, however, is a different story. Build a culture of appreciation, respect, and tolerance. A level-headed person: Emotional regulation and availability are also important. Meaning, History, Signs and Types, How to Emotionally Connect With a Man: 10 Ways, According to Zodiac Signs: the 3 Best Women to Marry, The Role of Romance in a Relationship and its Importance, How Important Is Intimacy in a Relationship, 10 Reasons Why Theres No Romance in Your Relationship, 8 Reasons to Put Date Night on Your Calendar, 11 Signs You Are Leading Someone On Unintentionally. Does A Friends With Benefits Relationship Actually Work? Emotions dont last long, but the real decision is whether you stay devoted to your love forever or not. If they arent capable of sustaining your interest for the long-haul, then there is no way you can expect long-lasting relationship success. 3. Nagging, cajoling, or complaining will not lead other people to give someone the love they want. Qualities like maturity, financial responsibility, and the willingness to stand by you through difficulties are characteristics of a woman with wifey material traits. | The person you marryshould be in love withyounot their idea of who they think you should be. Still, there are some more specific signs to look for, which are discussed in further detail below. One of the great characteristics of a good partner is their unwavering commitment towards their spouse. Instead, they should stay through the hard times as well. 1. The results of the survey also identified that the strongest marriages are those in which partners have strong communication skills, show flexibility, are close to one another, and have compatible personalities to help resolve conflicts. In other words: If your partner wants to travel overseas, but youre too scared to even get in the plane, then you might have a problem. Sounds obvious. When there is mutual fairness, score-keeping does not exist. Why Are the First Two Years of Marriage so Crucial? J Marriage Fam. and grant it. "If I was suspicious enough to . The legal advantages of marriage were particularly scrutinized in 2015, when legalizing same-sex marriage was being decided by the Supreme Court. Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com. "She wasn't desperate to get married," he says. Research published in the Journal of Happiness Studies shows that the relationship is healthier when couples prioritize we over me, i.e., the collective desire over their desires. If a couple openly discusses and respectfully resolves conflicts, they have a better chance of letting their love grow deeper. The University of Sussex published a study in which multitaskers were put to MRI scans. The person you marry doesn't have to agree with you on every issue, but even so, you must have a mutual respect for each other's core beliefs and values. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Disrespect in a marriage can make the fights hostile and hurtful. In 1939, men ranked it at No. These characteristics of a successful marriage may seem insignificant, but when practiced daily, they can save your marriage. One of the most relieving traits to look for in a person is someone who gives you their full attention. One of the essential characteristics of a good partner is that they share fantastic sexual chemistry with you. They are more likely to care and to try to take action to resolve problems in a relationship. A thoughtful partner: Research suggests that having a partner who is kind, gentle, and understanding is linked to lower marital conflict and higher marital satisfaction.. Friendship is a great foundation for a healthy relationship. Someone who requires constant attention and reassurance could make marriage more difficult. If you are wondering, What makes a marriage successful, look in the direction of the couples plans. The most admirable qualities in a person are love, forgiveness, communication skills, trust, commitment, and friendship not to mention sexual and emotional chemistry. When things are fine, commitment is easy, but people tend to leave as soon as things get hard. They are satisfied with how each other expresses. It is, therefore, extremely important to be honest with them. Touch makes us feel loved by our partner and builds. Seeing the lightness in things when they get too heavy. Many of these relationships begin with romantic love that is more passionate and physical. Happy couples report that they feel understood by their partners and can share their feelings, especially during a disagreement. The person you marryshould help you evolve into a better version of yourself. What Is Emotional Abandonment in Marriage.
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